


Unmade and Remade

by cynatnite



Series: Compromised [3]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, Rough Sex, discussion of Clint Barton/Phil Coulson, discussion of Melinda May/Grant Ward, spoilers for Yes Men episode
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-12
Updated: 2014-03-12
Packaged: 2018-01-15 12:43:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,044
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1305286
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cynatnite/pseuds/cynatnite
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Lorelei's thrall, Agent Grant Ward seeks out Clint Barton.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Unmade and Remade

Calais, France

 

It was much easier than Agent Grant Ward had figured in finding the out of the way hostel. It was situated not far from the port in the worst part of the city. French prostitutes and sailors from around the world frequented the area.

Evening was settling in and as he made his way through the crowd beginning to fill the sidewalk, he brushed off a prostitute trying to ply him with her wares. He stopped at the hostel and went inside. Bribing the clerk was a simple matter and was more pleased than he should’ve been at discovering the room would be empty.

Once upstairs, Grant found the room and picked the lock. It was a simple enough matter and he let himself inside. Grant flipped on the light and took in the small one room studio. A kitchenette in the corner had a full sink. The bathroom was behind him. He went to the dresser and opened it up. He found a few clothing items, but nothing else.

He wasn’t surprised. His prey always left little to nothing behind even if a return was planned. Grant had no doubt the prey would soon return. He went to the fridge and took the Pilsner beer out. Grant eased into the comfortable chair in the corner expecting to enjoy the drink before his prey arrived.

Sitting in the dark, Grant had long ago finished the beer. His feral grin widened when the door came open.

The figure stopped in the middle of the room. “I know you’re here.”

“I wasn’t hiding,” Grant replied.

“This wasn’t planned.”

“No.” Grant got to his feet.

Before his prey could react, Grant was on him. He grabbed him by the shirt and threw him towards the bed. The prey evaded then took a swing at him. Grant evaded and allowed his rage to take over as he kneed the prey in the stomach. It was enough to knock the wind from him.

Grant knelt down and reached for the prey’s pants. He yanked them down, then undid his own jeans.

“You’re not fighting me,” Grant observed.

“I’m not for prolonging shit.”

“Me neither.”

Grant spit on his hand and moistened his hard cock. He adjusted his prey’s hips for better access and pushed into him.

When Grant got a steady rhythm going, he reached around and found his prey’s dick hard in his hand. “You fucking wanted this.”

“Goddamn it! Yes!”

Leaning into him, Grant kept a tight hold on the erection and didn’t let up once on his hard thrusts. He knew his prey would soon be coming.

Grant bit his ear and breathed hard when he heard his prey groaning. “Don’t come until I say,” Grant ordered.

The prey growled in frustration, but didn’t come. Grant was glad of it. He released the cock and took hold of the prey’s hips. He pounded him hard unrelenting. Finally, he couldn’t take it anymore and let himself come.

“Now!” He roared.

As they came together, Grant kept going until there was nothing left inside of him. He eased out and breathing hard, Grant collapsed on the floor and leaned into the bed. He looked at his prey.

“Clint, are you okay?”

“Yeah.” Clint rolled to his back. Perspiration poured off of him and he wiped his face. “I don’t think you are.”

“Whatever.” Grant got to his feet and then helped Clint to his. “Shower?”

“Go ahead. I’ll wait.”

Grant didn’t say another word and headed to the bathroom.

~*~

While Clint was getting his shower, Grant used the opportunity to slip out for more beer and grabbed a couple of sandwiches on the way back. By the time he got back, Clint was on the bed wearing jeans, but not shirt. He kept his gaze averted and wondered if there would be slow and easy fucking later.

“Hungry?” Grant asked.

“Sure.”

They took the small table and ate not speaking. Finally, Clint dropped the last bit of his sandwich on the table. “What the hell is going on with you?”

“I know about you.”

“Yeah, I’m a fucking Avenger…or I’m supposed to be.”

“Everything, Clint. Coulson was your handler and your SO. He’s the reason you’re in SHIELD.”

“How?”

“Garrett was my SO. I had him track you down. He told me everything about you and Coulson.”

Clint threw down his napkin. “Fuck!”

“You have to know the rest of it.”

“What?”

“Coulson’s my SO.”

If anything could be more a punch to the gut for Clint that was it. He got up and moved about the room. Finally, he put his hands on his hips and turned. “That’s not why you came, is it? Did something happen?”

“I want to know why. Why aren’t you part of the team…us?”

“I don’t fucking owe you a damn thing.”

“Fuck you, Clint!” Grant yelled. “You owe me a hell of a lot more than that! We’ve been screwing each other for months trying to not get too involved and now here we are. More fucking involved than either one of us realizes.”

“What are you talking about?” Clint yelled back.

“I need answers from you. Not just about you and Coulson.” Grant rubbed his face trying to get a handle on his raging emotions. _Goddamn that staff!_ He screamed inside. “I…”

“Jesus, Grant.” Clint went closer to him. “What happened to you?”

“Right now, I want to fucking kill every goddamn Asgardian there is including that buddy of yours, Thor.”

The intensity on Grant’s face shook Clint. There was no doubt that he meant it. “Get over there and sit down. Start from the beginning.”

Grant did as he was told while Clint got a couple of beers from the fridge. He took one, opened it and had a long drink. “I fucking wish we had something stronger.”

“Later.” Clint opened his bottle. “Right now talk.”

“A few days ago, a criminal escaped from a prison on Asgard. Lady Sif was sent to retrieve her.”

“Who was he?”

“He was a she and her name was Lorelei.”

“Yeah, I think Thor mentioned her one time. He was pretty vague.”

“There’s a reason for that. It seems that she has a gift that turns men into giant walking dickheads.”

“I’m not getting you.”

“She did something to me, Clint. It was like she got into my fucking soul and twisted me inside out. I was ready to build a goddamn army for her so she could take the planet. I was close to doing it until Sif stopped her.”

“Fucking hell,” Clint breathed. “No wonder you’ve been on a rampage.”

“Well, that goddamn berserker staff hasn’t helped any. I want to fucking rip all their heads off and I’m not handling this lack of control very well.”

“And you knew I’d gone down the same road.” Clint leaned back and took a long drink of his beer.

“You seem cool and collected after what Loki did to you.”

“It’s been a while since it happened.”

“Tell me how you've learned to live with it.

“If that’s what you call it.” Clint lowered his eyes. “Loki’s always in my fucking head. I hear his voice in my ears. I hear that fucking laugh like he’s sitting right next to me. Sometimes it’s like he’s never left. There’s even a worse side to this thing that I’ve barely kept a handle on since it happened.”

“I think I know what it is,” Grant said.

“Tell me.”

“The unadulterated freedom to think, to say, to do whatever comes to mind. There was no holding back and it felt so fucking good.”

“Yeah,” Clint said. He remembered how easy it was to fall into the high of not holding anything back. There was a part of him that fought it, too, despite the high. “That’s exactly it. It’s like a fucking drug that you never get enough of.”

“Do you still want it?” Grant asked.

“Sometimes,” Clint admitted. “Like with any drug I never forget the costs. That’s what keeps me grounded and it keeps me from going to Asgard to get more from that fucking Loki. I fought it, too. Fought Loki. I think that's why the helicarrier didn't get taken down or that I didn't put one in the middle of Fury's head.”

Grant tried to remember if he fought Lorelei hard enough. The guilt was eating away like a cancer. “How far did he go with you?”

That was a question Clint wasn’t ready to answer. He got to his feet and went to the window. The ships moving about the late night waters were beautiful. He made a point to go on the roof later.

“All the way,” he said in a low voice. “I told him I would do anything he wanted. Give him anything he wanted. He took as much from me and my body as he could. He got inside me, saw me with Phil, took it and used it against all of us. Fucking bastard.”

“I’m sorry,” Grant said. “Lorelei had me telling her SHIELD secrets, things about myself and more.”

Clint turned. “What?”

“Time for a little more honesty on my part,” Grant confessed. “Melinda May and I had been sleeping together. I told Lorelei about it and there was someone else I wanted more. It was never clear to me beforehand, but then with Lorelei I was ripped open and forced to see things.

“About ourselves,” Clint continued. He went back to the table and sat across from Grant. “Maybe at one time this thing was like what peyote and the sweat lodge are to the Indians, a way of clarifying ourselves, learning who we are. Only these Asgardians took it to the next level and abused the power.”

“It doesn’t change what happened.”

“No. Nothing will.”

“What are we going to do?” Gant asked.

“Nothing we can do except move on.”

“You haven’t.”

“I can’t. Garrett’s been keeping me up to date. I know that Coulson checks on me from time to time. He’s trying to be careful because he knows the Clairvoyant may try to use me against him.”

“That could still happen.”

“No fucking way,” Clint swore. “I’ll eat my gun first and you can take that to the bank. I think it’s why the Clairvoyant hasn’t made a move on me.”

“After what happened to him when he died…”

“I’m not even sure if Coulson remembers what we had together. I don’t know if he should. Maybe it’s too dangerous for him…both of us. There's still too many goddamn unanswered questions.”

“Goddamn,” Grant sighed. He leaned back. “We’re fucked no matter what we do.”

Clint shrugged his shoulders. “It wouldn’t be SHIELD otherwise.”

“This thing with you and me…”

“You and Coulson could be vulnerable if we keep doing this. We don't know where any of us are headed or how high the costs are going to get.”

“I’m not sure if I want to end it with you and me,” Grant confessed. He cared more about Clint than he'd ever admit to anyone. “I’ve got to get a handle on this thing and I don’t think I can do it alone. You’re the only one who’d ever get what I’m going through. Shit, Clint, I’m compromised. Do you know how fucking weak that makes me?”

“Yeah, I do. I just don’t know if it’s a good idea that we keep doing this.”

“I’m not ready to end it. Not yet.”

“I've been so used to dealing with it alone. Maybe it's time to stop that.”

“I don’t want to hurt anyone. I still need you.”

“You got me.”

“Do you still love Coulson?”

“Nothing will ever undo that. It’s a lifetime thing. Do you love whoever it was that you said you wanted more than May?”

“I don’t know.” That was as honest as Grant was going to get with anyone about his convoluted emotions. No way could he make heads or tails of them.

Clint’s short laugh was bitter. “What a fucking pair we make.”

“Yeah.”

Clint got to his feet. “Come on. Let’s go play some pool and get a drink. Unwinding is definitely on the agenda.

Grant couldn’t agree more.

 

END


End file.
